I am reading this fantastic book on habits and it's got me thinking about my own; conscious and unconscious. I've realized a big habit of mine is saying yes. It flows out of my mouth so easily sometimes, I don't even realize it. 90% of the time I genuinely want to be on board but haven't taken the time to actually see if I can or if it fits with my current workload or mission. My habit is not necessarily bad, but if not managed properly can led to destruction. Destruction in my relationships, body and even soul.
The scenario goes:
I hear of a great project.
I am supportive.
I love to be apart of something.
I feel my highest high when I am working toward a goal
I jump in! Say Yes!
I am on a mission to get focused! I know that if I want to continue to be of service and contribute I need to be smarter in my alignments. I need to take care of not just my need to be a part of things but the needs of the people and projects I take on. This has become my yoga. So I've made a commitment to myself to start three new habits, each hand picked with the intention of providing space for me to look at the bigger picture. Not deprive my soul (or sanity) of anything and to make sure I'm serving others in the best light possible.
Habits are tricky however, they say it only takes 20+ days create a new habit but it actually goes a lot deeper than that. Habits aren't actually formed until you get your brain and heart on board. There's got to be a bigger why to why you start and most importantly stick with it. So, I'm going to share my 3 new habits below but if they don't resonate with you find some that do. Point is (and this is worth saying) - you can't please everybody, you are not nutella! and even if saying YES! to everything is not your downfall the 3 habits below could serve you in other ways. Check your own habits and see if they are helping or keeping you from the life you want.
1. Create a morning ritual that is yours.
One of the #1 things you will always hear/read from fellow entrepreneurs, moguls and big shots is that they have a dedicated morning routine. It's theirs! They are committed to doing it every morning even if it means waking up an hour early - they know that this is what sets the tone for their day. I've been envious of this for so long and then it hit me that I can control this. I decidewhen I wake up, how I spend that first hour and what level of priority I make it. So I did. I now wake up an hour before the rest of the household. I make my Yerba Mate and I read something inspirational. I meditate for 5-10minutes - which allows me to make space in my head and clear out some noise, brush my teeth and shower all before even checking a single email, Instagram comment, Facebook like or Snapchat. To make it even easier I had to go a little old school and purchase an actual alarm clock. It was toooooo easy to reach over turn off the alarm on my phone and linger a bit.
2. Say no quickly and Yes slowly.
We all have moments when we get caught up in not wanting to hurt someones feelings or come off un-supportive - and if you're in the same boat as me (a little too sensitive at times) you don't want someone to feel rejected when you don't say yes to their project. The thing is though you know in your gut what you want to do, what lights you up and what is in alignment for you. There's no question about it, there are passion projects and passionless projects. For sanity sake (you and them) say no immediately to things that just don't make sense. Don't waste time 'thinking about it' - you'll only end up making a guilt rid decision or burning a bridge. On the other side - say yes slowly. Take 24 hours to think about it. Meditate over it. Soak in a bath of lavender Epsom salt and listen to Deva Premal before sending that email or making that call. Figure out WHY you feel the urge to be apart of it. You might find out that you can be supportive of it in a minor way that doesn't take so much time and energy or you might just realize you want to go all in and nothing will stand in your way!
As a business owner, solopreneur, creative - I spend a lot of my time working; I don't have a set schedule or routine. On my own stuff, I don't necessarily clock in or out and as long as the work is done I could do it at anytime. This is the problem - sometimes sleep can seem optional, adherence to a goal or deadline or just plan inconvenient. This is wrong! Arianna Huffington has a fabulous new book out called, The Sleep Revolution - explaining how disillusioned we are as a society on the importance of sleep. I HIGHLY recommend you read this book - it will change your whole perspective on why we need sleep. Bottom line, you need sleep to be coherent, rational, creative, focused, organized, safe! So I'm committed to shutting down all work by 9pm and all electronics 30 minutes before going to sleep.
Habits. Alright, it's your turn now. What and where in your life can you make a change?
On a mission.